Michael's posts with tag: dawn
Comments made in the year 1955
That's only 53 years ago!
"I'll tell you one thing, if things keep going the way they are, it's going to be impossible to buy a week's groceries for $20.00."
"Have you seen the new cars coming out next year? It won't be long before $2, 000.00 will only buy a used one."
"If cigarettes keep going up in price, I'm going to quit. A quarter a pack is ridiculous.
"Did you hear the post office is thinking about charging a dime just to mail a letter?"
"If they raise the minimum wage to $1.00, nobody will be able to hire outside help at the store."
"When I first started driving, who would have thought gas would someday cost 29 cents a gallon. Guess we'd be better off leaving the car in the garage."
"Kids today are impossible. Those duck tail hair cuts make it impossible to stay groomed. Next thing you know, boys will be wearing their hair as long as the girls."
"I'm afraid to send my kids to the movies any more. Ever since they let Clark Gable get by with saying DAMN in GONE WITH THE WIND, it seems every new movie has either HELL of DAMN in it."
"I read the other day where some scientist thinks it's possible to put a man on the moon by the end of the century. They even have some fellows they call astronauts preparing for it down in Texas ."
"Did you see where some baseball player just signed a contract for $75,000 a year just to play ball? It wouldn't surprise me if someday they'll be making more than the President."
"I never thought I'd see the day all our kitchen appliances would be electric. They are even making electric typewriters now."
"It's too bad things are so tough nowadays. I see where a few married women are having to work to make ends meet."
"It won't be long before young couples are going to have to hire someone to watch their kids so they can both work."
"Marriage doesn't mean a thing any more, those Hollywood stars seem to be getting divorced at the drop of a hat."
"I'm afraid the Volkswagen car is going to open the door to a whole lot of foreign business."
"Thank goodness I won't live to see the day when the Government takes half our income in taxes. I sometimes wonder if we are electing the best people to congress."
"The drive-in restaurant is convenient in nice weather, but I seriously doubt they will ever catch on."
"There is no sense going to Lincoln or Omaha anymore for a weekend, it costs nearly $15.00 a night to stay in a hotel."
"No one can afford to be sick anymore, at $35.00 a day in the hospital it's too rich for my blood."
"If they think I'll pay 50 cents for a hair cut, forget it."
Know any friends who would get a kick out of these, pass this on! Be sure and send it to your kids and grand kids too
As you may have heard the Bush Administration said each and every one of
us would now get a nice rebate. If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all
the money will go to China. If we spend it on gasoline it will all go to
the Arabs, if we purchase a computer it will all go to India, if we
purchase fruit and vegetables it will all go to Mexico, Honduras, and
Guatemala, if we purchase a good car it will all go to Japan, if we
purchase useless crap it will all go to Taiwan and none of it will help
the American economy.
We need to keep that money here in America, so the only way to keep that
money here at home is to buy beer, since those are the only businesses
still in the US
|  | This is the missing picture from the blog |
Jeff Foxworthy on Buffalo
If you consider it a sport to sit in anice hut all day long with a rod and reel just to put perch in your freezer..you might live in Buffalo.
If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each yearbecause Lewiston is the coldest spot in the nation,you might live in Buffalo.
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might livein Buffalo.
If you instinctively walk like a penguin for five months out of the year, youmight live in Buffalo.
If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, youmight live in Buffalo; because you're all so damn friendly.
If you have ever worn shorts, sunglasses and a parka at the same time, youmight live in Buffalo.
If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, or if you are in churchand your priest or minister asks you to pray for the Bills, and wants to getyou all home for 1 p.m. kickoff you might live in Buffalo.
If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed awrong number, you might live in Buffalo.
YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE Buffalonian when:
1. 'Vacation' means going over to your cabin in Canada for the weekend.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3 . You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from 'heat' to 'A/C' in the same day and back again.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, withoutflinching.
6. You carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them.
7. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
8. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
9. You know all 4 seasons: almost fall, winter, still winter and roadconstruction.
10. Down south to you means ERIE, PA.
11. You find '0' degrees 'a little chilly.'
12. You go out to fish fry every Friday, Prime Rib on Saturday and bingo everyWednesday.
13. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
14. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
15. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them to all your Buffalo friends!
Start theyear off right. Easy
Pastor's Business Card
A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.
Therefore, he took out a business card and wrote "Revelation 3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, "Genesis 3:10."
Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. Revelation 3:20 begins "Behold, I stand at the door and knock." Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked."
Remember when the funniest jokes were the clean ones? They still are! Pass it on
"A cheerful heart is good medicine" (Prov. 17:22)
We are in trouble...
The population of this country is 300 million. That leaves 140 million to do the work. There are 85 million in school. Which leaves 55 million to do the work. Of this there are 35 million employed by the federal government. Leaving 15 million to do the work. 2.8 million are in the armed forces preoccupied with killing Osama Which leaves 12.2 million to do the work. Take from that total the 10.8 million people who work for state and city Governments. And that leaves 1.4 million to do the work. At any given time there are 188,000 people in hospitals. Leaving 1,212,000 to do the work. Now, there are 1,211,998 people in prisons. That leaves just two people to do the work. At your computer, reading jokes.
 | Joke | Dec 19, '07 5:11 PM
for everyone |
OUT ON THE RANGE A guy from Houston, a guy from Toronto, and a guy from Buffalo are out riding horses. The Houstonite pulls out an expensive bottle of whiskey, takes a shot, then another, and suddenly throws the bottle in the air, pulls out his gun and shoots the bottle in mid air. The Torontonian looks at him and says, "What are you doing?! That was a perfectly good bottle of whiskey!" The Houstonite says, "In Texas, there's plenty of whiskey and bottles are cheap." A while later, not wanting to be outdone, the Torontonian pulls out a bottle of champagne, takes a few sips, throws the bottle in the air, pulls out his gun and shoots it. The guy from Buffalo can't believe this and says, "What did you do that for? That was an expensive bottle of champagne!" The Torontonian says, "In Canada, there's plenty of champagne and bottles are cheap." So a while later the Buffalonian pulls out a bottle of beer. He opens it, takes a sip, takes another sip, and then chugs the rest. He then puts the bottle back in his saddlebag, pulls out his gun, turns around and shoots the Canadian. The Texan, shocked, says, "Why did you do that?" The Buffalonian says, "Well, in Buffalo, we have plenty of Canadians, but bottles are worth a nickel
| |
