I got this joke from a Link on Deb's Multiply page:

Compassion with an umbrella

A Western Buddhist woman was In india, studying with her teacher. She was riding with another woman friend in a rickshaw-like carriage, when they were attacked by a man on the street. In the end, the attacker only succeeded in frightening the women, but the Buddhist woman was quite upset by the event and told her teacher so. She asked him what she should have done - what would have been the appropriate, Buddhist response.

The teacher said very simply, "You should have very mindfully and with great compassion whacked the attacker over the head with your umbrella."

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This reminds me of 4th grade. It was supposed to rain so my great grandmother made me take an umbrella to school. Well, it turned out to be a nice sunny day. At the time we were allowed to home for lunch. This kid (David North) in 5th grade that I never liked (and in 1987 had reason to hate) decided he wanted to make fun of me and my umbrella on the way home for lunch. We got to the corner of my street and I finally had enough and gave him Buddist teachings and whaked him between the eyes with the umbrella. My tough guy ran home crying and didn't come back to school after lunch. I never had a problem with him again. (1987 wasn't actually about him)

Not exactly the proper thing to do during lunch at a Catholic School but hey he was a whinny bully that picked on the wrong person.